Euphoria

A Comical View of Life

2008-12-02T11:21:00.000-08:00

I'm currently reading a very short book about a little boy named Charlie.

Charlie thinks he spends too much time doing things that he doesn't really want to do, so he decides to pack up everything he has and travel the world to find things that are more worth his while.

I wanted to share a little excerpt that makes me smile every time I read it:

"And pack up his time he did:
starting with his big, bulky decades,
then round, squishy years,
the square, mushy months,
triangular, shiny weeks,
and raggedy days,
tons of silky, smooth hours,
and crumpled minutes."

This book is so cute and the moral so simple, I decided this will be my Christmas gift to my nephew Jake. But I'm holding off on the wrapping because I keep picking it up to read it.

Time to Breathe

2008-10-15T14:08:00.000-07:00

Doesn't seem like I've had much of a chance to do that recently. But I realize it's been a long while since I've last blogged and I figured I'd give a little update.

I've been really busy with work and I decided to take on a second job to get a boost with the monthly burden of paying what seems like an endless stream of bills. So I am now working at Dream Dinners. I help set up sessions for people to come in and assemble their meals for the month, then I follow up behind each group and clean up the stations for the next round of people. It's not a bad gig. It's a great working environment. Great people, very flexible, and easy. It's a change from my normal job of sitting at a computer and logging in numbers all day. It's a good break.

Ben is also looking for another job which will offer benefits because his main employment now does not. So this will help immensely..and be 2 less bills we have to pay each month. Woo hoo! I'm so thankful that I married such a hard working guy. He's willing to do what it takes to make things work. I'm so grateful that he possesses such a willing attitude. I don't have that kind of stamina in the work force. 2 jobs is enough for me!

We are planning on going to India again this January. Ben and I are very excited to finally go back. We missed last year's trip so we are eager for this chance. I'm taking on a bigger role this year on the team so I'm staying busy with many meetings, a lot of which are weekly meetings. I'm enjoying the process though. I love learning the ins and outs of the logistics..which is good since that's technically my title, Logistics Coordinator. A bonus for this year's trip though is my dad has decided to be apart of the team. HUGE deal. I can't even express how excited I am that he is taking this opportunity. It means a lot to Ben and to me. Now it's time to work my mom into going in the near future!

This past weekend my family and many other friends went to the pumpkin patch to celebrate my youngest nephew's 1st birthday. It was a beautiful day! No rain and so much sunshine. Which makes for lots of smiling kids, happy parents, no mud to be cleaned off, and some great pictures. Ben and I picked out our first pumpkins together, which was also our first time to visit a pumpkin patch together...ever. It was a great and fun day overall.

That's all for now!

Hooked

2008-08-25T13:41:00.001-07:00

Ben and I are hooked on Threadless.

When I tell people about this place, most people don't know what I'm talking about. So I thought I'd share.

Threadless is a website where you can order t-shirts, usually with very cleaver and funny designs. People can write into Threadless with ideas for new t-shirts and designs of their own, they are voted on and if your design gets picked to go to press...you get paid for it. How awesome is that!

Ben has SO many great ideas for new t-shirts so hopefully we can have some Ben inspired shirts in circulation soon. Could be interesting.

I thought I'd share some of the t-shirt designs that I have purchased...mostly for Ben:

"Birthday"

"Camouflage"

"Fail"

"Lemon Aid"

"War and Peas"

A Night at the Opera

2008-08-14T10:35:00.000-07:00

I just bought tickets for Phantom of the Opera. I have LOVED this production since I was a little kid. I actually have had the entire script since I was little. I have a book with all the pictures and behind the scenes production notes from the early versions. I've played the music on the piano for years, listened to the Broadway soundtrack countless times...you could say I'm a Phantom Phanatic. :)

When Ben told me he had never seen it before I knew the next time it came to town we would be buying tickets...no matter what.

2 weeks from today we will be there. The countdown has begun and to gear up for that night...I will be listening to the soundtrack non-stop now.

Celebration of 7's Begins

2008-08-07T09:28:00.000-07:00

Aug 7th: Happy Birthday to my nephew Jake! He turns 3 today but we are planning a family party for him on Sunday which will include one of his favorite things...watching planes at the airshow.

Soon to come:

Sept 7th: My 24th birthday. Don't know exactly the plans but Ben has something up his sleeve.

Oct 7th: Happy birthday to my other nephew Sammy! He'll be 1 year old. We'll probably have a big party for him like we did for Jake's 1st birthday. I'm sure a lot of smooshing cake between the fingers will be involved too.

Dec 7th: Ben and I celebrate our 1 year anniversary. Again, Ben has some plans going on that I have no idea about.

Summer Scream Week

2008-07-22T12:37:00.000-07:00

It is a week that Ben looks forward to all year. He starts to map out his strategy and plan of attack on the other teams...even before the actual teams are formed. He lives and breathes competition. And the energy overload that comes with a summer camp of junior highers is too much that Ben pretty much can't talk about anything else in the weeks before the event begins.

Ever since he left Sunday morning, I come home to a quiet apartment everyday. Normally I'd love this but I'm getting to the point where I'm used to having Ben there. I now spend nights reading my books (which I can now enjoy uninterrupted) or catching up on some favorite reality shows (which I can enjoy also..without whining).

But most of the time I've been playing with my rabbit, who doesn't really offer much other than a few acrobatic flips and mid-air kicks for some entertainment. It's cute...it's almost like he knows that I'm lonely and he is trying desperately to help.

Ben is having a blast and I can't watch him have fun. I want to be there so bad but I just can't take work off...well, I could but it's not the easiest thing to do. I find myself realizing how much I love coming home and having him there or just knowing that at some point during the day I get to see him, Summer Scream weeks throw off my routine. :)

Only two more Ben-less days. Good thing because I've got a tired and worn out bunny on my hands.

What is Love?

2008-07-15T09:34:00.000-07:00

'When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love.' Rebecca- age 8

'When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth' Billy - age 4

'Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.' Karl - age 5

'Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.' Chrissy - age 6

'Love is what makes you smile when you're tired.' Terri - age 4

'Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.' Danny - age 7

'Love is when you kiss all the time Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss' Emily - age 8

'Love is what's in the room with you're at Christmas and you stop opening presents and listen.' Bobby - age 7

'If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,' Nikka - age 6

'Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.' Noelle - age 7

'Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.' Tommy - age 6

'During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore' Cindy - age 8

'My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.' Clare - age 6

'Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.' Elaine-age 5

'Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford.' Chris - age 7

'Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.' Mary Ann - age 4

'I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.' Lauren - age 4

'When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.' Karen - age 7

'Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross.' Mark - age 6

'You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.' Jessica - age 8

Currently Reading...

2008-06-30T13:12:00.000-07:00

The Shack. I'm almost done, only a couple chapters left.

I know there is a lot of controversy surrounding this book. Church leaders slamming it for it's off-beat theology, others claiming it to be life-changing and a book that brought God into a new light.

However to interpret this book is up to the reader themselves. You may be one who knows about the controversies and puts up a great defensive barrier before even picking up the book. Or you may be one who approaches the book as purely fiction, a good read...and nothing more.

I chose to pick up the book with an open mind. I deliberately chose to not read any reviews or listen to any one's conversations regarding the book so that I wouldn't be influenced either way. And I'm so glad I did.

Even though I'm not completely finished with the book I have a pretty good grasp of the concept and direction the writer is going. But I kept reminding myself...this is fiction.

If you haven't read the book and you wish to, you might not want to read the rest of my post...I wouldn't want to spoil too much or even be one of those people whose insights enable other's thoughts on the matter.

Throughout reading the book, as I said before, I intentionally kept my mind open to all possibilities. Sure, the author might have some interesting takes on God, Jesus, The Spirit and many other things but I didn't want to discredit him and shut it all down before I actually gave it a little more time and thought. I'm not saying I agree with him totally..by any means. But there are some very valid points and some truth in his writing which were encouraging to me as I read them. Those feelings that he portrays the main character, Mack, having are feelings that I have felt before. Those questions that Mack so genuinely asks are questions I think most people have cried out wondering what the answers were.

It took me a bit of time to get passed Mack's first meeting at the shack. I'm sure many people were stumped by his encounter. At first I laughed. Of course the author feels he needs to be politically correct. Woman, black, Asian, middle eastern...and later on Hispanic, all rolled into one to create the Trinity and other attributes of God.

But then I thought. Why not? I kinda like the spin the author took on it. It took me awhile to get passed it but I thought, I'm glad he didn't limit the image of God. Putting the image of God into writing and into an actually picture is impossible anyway. So I'd like to think the author did the best he could, to make God a tangible image to a very hurt and lost man (Mack). I'm sure some people would totally argue with me on that because it is a little out there...but that's what happens when I keep an open mind. I don't like putting God in a box and limiting Him on how He can show Himself to others.

There's so much more to the book that I could write about and maybe after I finish it I'll post again. But for now I'll just end with:

This book is a good read. It is fiction. People can take from it what they wish. If they feel moved by what he says, great. If they are angered at what he says, that's fine too.

I've heard that many church pastors and other leaders have requested their congregations to read this book. For what reason, I don't know. It puts pressure on people to dig for some great meaning and inspirational enlightening and it elevates the expectations for a book. A book that wasn't even meant to be published in the first place, it was just to be for the writer's family and friends. He was encouraged to get it published by those close to him. It wasn't meant for the public to pick apart and criticise. So I don't think he had a preconceived agenda to change people's vision of God or their beliefs. He simply just took what was going on in his mind and heart and put it onto paper.

If I were given that opportunity I'm sure my vision of God and my jumbled thoughts on my life and my life with God and all the questions I have...well, some people may think I'm a little wacky and out there too.

Undo

2008-06-23T11:28:00.000-07:00

Wouldn't it be great if life included an "Undo" button?

When you think everything is going great, then something happens. Something stupid is said and you make yourself seem like a complete fool. Or something hurtful comes spewing out of your mouth and it was never intended to translate the way it did. Or in a fit of anger you do incredibly irrational things, resulting in embarrassment.

These are times where I think an "Undo" button would be very helpful. Actually there are a few keys on the keyboard that would be useful. "Backspace", "Delete", even "Home"...basically any keyboard function that will take me immediately back to the beginning or to the specific place where things went wrong and need to be corrected.

If only it were that easy.

Dream..on the way to be...Coming True

2008-05-29T10:33:00.000-07:00

When you are a kid, a common question you are asked is: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

I'd have different answers to this question throughout many years but the most consistent answer I had was, "To be a wildlife photographer in Africa." That was what I wanted. My dream was to work for National Geographic.

I went as far as taking photography classes in junior high and I got my first real camera. It was very exciting. But I realized photography was not easy and it was an expensive hobby. As I got into high school, my interests turned to choir and so photography got pushed back a bit so I could focus on my opportunities that came along with the singing groups I was involved in.

Now that I'm out of school and choir is no longer on my mind, I have taken up the idea of getting back into photography. I love my little digital camera I have now, but I want to graduate up to a digital SLR camera. There are so many things that I'd love to capture and with great quality that a little digital camera is just not capable of doing.

I've been doing lots of research the past couple of months on what to look for in a good SLR and one that will fit my photography style. Like I had mentioned before, photography is an expensive endeavor. The body of an SLR can be in the thousands of dollars, that's not including the price of any lens. Which, if you want to really excel in photography you will want to purchase multiple lenses for versatility.

But I think I finally found the right one for me. I'm super excited too because the one I picked won't break the bank. Woo hoo! And it comes with a lens so I won't have to make too many additional purchases in order to use my camera. I probably won't be getting it for another couple of months still, so I have some time for preparation and saving.

What's even better is that I'll have this great camera before our next trip to India. (Oh yes, Ben and I are planning to join the next India trip again.) So I'll have some time to master this new camera, with the help of my soon to be photography partner and SLR expert...Erin. :o)

So my dream of being a wildlife photographer may not be too far off!! Especially with the globe trekking that Ben and I plan to do, I'm hoping to only get better and better. Maybe not good enough for National Geographic but I'm still optimistic on that one.

Starbucks Snob

2008-05-20T10:03:00.000-07:00

Yep..that's me, it's official.

There is a deli on the first floor of my office building. They serve coffee and have a whole array of flavors to mix into any kind of drink you want. It's cheaper too, but I don't get coffee there. Because it's not Starbucks.

There is a 7-11 by my office building. They have coffee there too that is also cheaper. But again, I don't go there. Because it's not Starbucks.

The Starbucks by my work is actually in a terrible location. It only has 7 parking spots and it shares what little space it has with a Chevron gas station and a Mexican restaurant, and located on a high traffic road where Scholls becomes Skyline right off of Hwy 26. An unbelievably small space, but it doesn't stop the throngs of people that flood into that tiny parking lot to get fueled for the day, and I'm not talking about gasoline fuel.

I am one of those people fighting for an empty parking space. You wouldn't believe how aggressive and hostile people can be when they haven't had their morning coffee. Unfortunately I can be just as bad as any of them. I frequent this Starbucks so much that the baristi already know my order when I walk through the door and have it ready before I even pay.

Today it hit me just how much I rely on Starbucks. One of my ex co-workers got a job in a different building on Sylvan Hill but we are still within walking distance of each other. She called my office this morning and said she was on her way to Starbucks before heading to work. I gave her my order and she would be down in front of my building in 10 minutes.

I ran downstairs and there she was. I exchanged the money for the cup of coffee. I just had to say to her, "Wow, you have become my coffee dealer. Nice doing business with you."

So there you have it. I have sunk so low that I refuse cheaper, more convenient, and more accessible coffee.

Just label me a Starbucks Snob...I'm satisfied with that.

Stress Relief

2008-05-20T09:38:00.000-07:00

A lecturer when explaining stress management to an
audience, raised a glass of water and asked
'How heavy is this glass of water?'

Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.
The lecturer replied, 'The absolute weight doesn't
matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it.

If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem.

If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right
arm.

If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an
ambulance.

In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I
hold it, the heavier it becomes.'

He continued, 'And that's the way it is with stress
management. If we carry our burdens all the time,
sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy,
we won't be able to carry on.'

'As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for
a while and rest before holding it again.
When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.'

'So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of
work down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow.
Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for
a moment if you can.'

So, put down anything that may be a burden to
you right now.

Don't pick it up again until after you've rested awhile.

Mini Backpacks and Aviator Goggles?

2008-05-06T10:49:00.000-07:00

That is what I dream about apparently.

I had a dream last night that I was in a pet shop. I came to a tank that had 2 hamsters in it. One had a little zip up jumpsuit and aviator goggles over it's beady little eyes. A hamster, with a mini jumpsuit! It even had a tiny little zipper.

The second hamster had a mini backpack on its back...as if it were about to head off to school.

I remember saying to myself in the dream that I would totally buy those hamsters just because of the outfits. They were so darn cute. I think I woke myself up by my laughing.

According to Ben this was a blog worthy dream. So I hope you enjoyed it. :o)

Tired of Being Sick

2008-04-08T13:52:00.000-07:00

I don't understand why in the last 4-5 months I've gotten sick so much. It actually started earlier than that. September. It was my birthday and I was moving to a new apartment...in 90 degree weather. I had a terrible cold and was completely miserable. My head and ears throbbed to the point where I was lying on the floor in tears and to those who know me that was a big thing since I'm not prone to tears.

Then after the wedding and honeymoon I came to work in early January...and discovered I was breaking out in hives. No big deal, I figured they would go away in a few days, maybe a week at the most. A month went by and I had broken out at least once every day, in different areas and to different degrees of severity. It was miserable, especially since the doctors couldn't figure out what was causing them.

Then just this past week I noticed some little red bumps on my left hand. I thought, Oh great! Hives are back. I pulled up the sleeve of my shirt to see what extent they had traveled up my arm. They just stayed around the underside of my left wrist and the palm of my hands. Odd. The next day I saw a few red bumps on the palm of my right hand. But these felt different than hives and I knew they had to be something different. I took Benedryl and all sorts of medication that I had on hand from my hives experience, but nothing was helping.

I went to urgent care, they gave me a steroid cream but they still didn't know what was wrong. They offered me a business card to a dermatologist office, I called but unfortunately they couldn't see me until May. So I talked to my parent's and they gave me the number to their doctor. I scheduled an appointment with my parents' doctor that same day. When I saw him he said in his 20+ years of experience as a doctor, he has never seen my condition in his life. He even pulled another specialist from his office into the room to check out my hands. He didn't know what it was either. The doctor assured me that he would call a couple dermatologists that he knew first thing the following morning.

I got into the dermatologist around 2pm in the afternoon, expecting to be poked and scraped but he said since my condition had been going on for 4 days now, the best time to do any tests would have been on the first day of the break out. Funny he says that when it's darn near impossible to get an immediate appointment with a dermatologist. Anyway, he still got to examine me and he came up with some sort of an explanation for me. Even though it's not for sure, since he wasn't able to do tests to confirm but he had a good idea that it is a form of Herpes Simplex. I pretty much freaked out at that point, but he assured me that just like cold sores are a strain of "herpes"...that is kind of what I have on my arm and palms. He said it would go away in a couple weeks and to put steroid cream on and it will be fine. Well, I'm glad I finally have an answer to why I was in agony over my arm and palms itching and burning like crazy.

But it does not end there...

I woke up this morning with a sore throat, swollen glands, throbbing head, muffled ears, and achy body. Lovely. I thought I was done with all my sickness. Then I remembered that the dermatologist had said I have a weakened immune system now, which probably helped bring on my arm herpes stuff in the first place.

I just want to be well again!

Funny Stuff Happens at 3am

2008-03-26T16:12:00.000-07:00

Last night I had a hard time sleeping. I finally decided to get out of the bedroom around 3am-ish and meet Ben in the living room. My mornings are his nights thanks to a wonderful work schedule.

We sat on the couch flipping through channels on the tv and settled on the comedy channel. There was a comedian by the name Demetri Martin. He was pretty funny. Either that or we were both SO tired that anything was funny.

I'd like to share some of my favorite quotes of his:

“One of my friends has a stutter and a lot of people think that’s a bad thing, but to me that’s just like starting certain words with a drum roll. That’s not an impediment, that’s suspense! What’s he going to say? Car?? …or Carnival?? …Carburetor!?!?"

“A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he’s persuasive. ‘Dude make a left.’ ‘Those are trees…’ ‘Trust me.’ "

“I was making pancakes the other day and a fly flew into the kitchen. And that’s when I realized that a spatula is a lot like a fly-swatter. And a crushed fly is a lot like a blueberry. And a roommate is a lot like a fly eater.”

"My favorite fruit is grapes. Because with grapes, you always get another chance. ‘Cause, you know, if you have a crappy apple or a peach, you’re stuck with that crappy piece of fruit. But if you have a crappy grape, no problem - just move on to the next. ‘Grapes: The Fruit of Hope.’ ”

“I used to play sports. Then I realized you can buy trophies. Now I’m good at everything.”

Conspiracy?... I Think So

2008-03-26T10:49:00.000-07:00

I've been married for almost 4 months now and I have yet to drop the name Brookshire and become an official Christensen.

This is for many reasons, but the main reason is because it's UNBELIEVABLY inconvenient. I have to change my name with Social Security, DMV, bank, all places that I pay bills to, vehicle registration, voters registration, auto insurance, medical insurance...on and on the list goes. The main ones though are social security, DMV, and my bank.

Well, I called the bank today because I needed to order some more checks and might as well put my new name on them, right? Turns out the bank needs me to come in with my marriage license and my new driver's license with the new name on them.

Shoot! I can't go to the DMV because they have odd hours and the only time that I could go there is on a Saturday (mornings preferably, when the lines are short) and I've been busy EVERY Saturday. So I plan to go into the DMV this Saturday morning, but according to the website there are new regulations to attaining a replacement license. I need my social security card.

So, I call social security. Only to find out, they need my new drivers license. What is the deal?!?

Bank needs my new drivers license, DMV needs my new social security card, social security needs my drivers license. I'm getting the idea that the government is trying to discourage name changes. They certainly don't make this process easy.

And this is the reason I remain a Brookshire...for now.

God Smiled on Me Today...

2008-03-24T11:55:00.000-07:00

Last night, while I was doing the laundry, I found a $5 bill. Woo hoo! That will be for my Monday morning coffee on the way to work.

So I grabbed my grande white chocolate mocha to start off my morning. I downed it in probably 10 minutes. Around 10:30, one of my co-workers was going around the office asking for Starbucks drink orders. I figured...hey, why not?

I go up to Starbucks with my co-worker to help her bring back all the orders. While I'm there I pay for my venti white mocha which is normally $4.10. But the cashier I think overheard my comment to my co-worker that I should start a tab at Starbucks because it's practically my home away from home. Well, the cashier paid for a big chunk of my drink! Oh, but It doesn't end there.

While we were waiting for the rest of the drink orders to be finished, we realized there was an extra venti white mocha sitting on the counter for us. I swear a beam from heaven shown down upon it.

So here I am at my desk enjoying the 3rd white chocolate mocha in 4 hours, and I only spent $6 :o)

The Joy of Answering Phones

2008-03-17T09:43:00.000-07:00

It's a challenging day at work and I've only been here for 2 hours.

A part of my job is answering phones for the company I work for, but I actually answer for 2 companies since we have merged but are still considered 2 separate companies for now.

Some days I don't mind answering the phones. After all that's what I get paid to do. But today I have no patience for people. So I've made a list of the following things that have grated on me so far today:

I'm easily irritated by those who don't know what they are calling about in the first place and don't actually speak full sentences to allow me to help them,
those who don't know who they were just talking to on the phone and want me to figure it out for them in an office full of people,
people who don't like to go into voicemail and decide to ring back to my desk 3 times in a row because they can't decide what they want to do,
people who are so ignorant of the fact that we serve OTHER clients and not just them,
family members of my co-workers who call in several times in the day when personal phone calls are not allowed...period by company policy.
people who have a cockiness and arrogance that they know everything when in fact they have no idea what they are talking about.
people who have the audacity to say "I'm from California, can't you do something for me?" (no joke, this actually was said).
Those who don't let me finish a sentence and decide that I can't be of further assistance to them so they cut me off.

These are just a few things that have bothered me thus far today.

Must go for now, the phone is ringing yet again.

I'm intrigued to see what piece of work will be on the other line this time.

Bad Luck

2008-03-03T09:29:00.000-08:00

Unfortunately Ben's car got broken into last week and his wallet and our digital camera got stolen. The reason for my posting this is because I was reminded you can never be too safe or too confident when leaving things in your car. Regardless of WHERE you park. Ben was working at the church, like he does every night. His car was parked where it is always parked. Nothing out of the ordinary. So when I was told this happened at the church, my heart dropped. I guess this kind of thing can happen anywhere and to anyone. I just wasn't expecting it and that's probably when those kind of things happen.

It's sad news for many different reasons.

Being broken into is a jolting enough feeling all on it's own. It's an incredible violation. Panic mode sets in and you feel utterly exposed. I felt awful for Ben. A wallet is a man's life pretty much. And reporting something as valuable as a wallet is so cumbersome. The different avenues you have to travel in order to right the wrongs of someone else's boredom, mischievousness, lack of attention...who knows the reasons behind someones decision to steal.

Then my camera. Oh I was so sad to hear that my poor little camera that is so loved became a victim. You are probably thinking... it's just a camera, so easily replaceable. Yes, yes that is true. But I LOVED my camera. In fact, I loved this camera so much that every time Ben would take it from the house I would give the look. The look that said "If anything happens to that camera, you die".

My first digital camera was one that I bought right before my trip to India. Unfortunately a few months following my return from India, I can only assume that I either left the camera somewhere or it was stolen. But ALL my pictures I took from India are gone because I had yet to download them onto my computer. LESSON: ALWAYS DOWNLOAD.

So because I loved that camera so much, I decided to buy the exact same one right before we left on our honeymoon. I bought the same case that was used on the first one as well. Everything was the same. Well, it got stolen out of Ben's car. Luckily, all of our amazing pictures we took of our trip got safely downloaded onto Ben's laptop but still....no camera.

It's sad news. Ben has been trying to counsel and reassure me. :o) He's actually handled this whole situation SO much better than me and he is the one that has more damage done!

Anyway, we've both come to grips with the fact that we will most likely not see either of our lost items again. So we will be trying to replace everything in the next few weeks.

Something that Ben said to me that I'd like to pass on as well: Be thankful and grateful for what you have but also remember what is really important in life because God just might decide to remind you, He can easily take it all away.

After the Wedding...

2008-03-03T08:58:00.000-08:00

It's been a long time since I've last blogged, and I thought it was time to get back into it. There is so much to write about and update everyone on since Ben and I got married. So I will do my best to give a quick rundown of the the "going-on's".

December was a busy month, as most know since that was the month we got hitched. The wedding was so fun. I was not nervous at all. The ENTIRE day I was relaxed and just excited for this once in a lifetime experience. I felt beautiful, the church was decorated perfectly (a big thank you to Cheryl for that!), I was surrounded by the people who are so very important in my life and whom I love very much. It was amazing.

I remember the first thing I said after Ben and I had gone back down the aisle as man and wife. "Is that really it??? It happened so fast! I want to do it again!" Throughout the ceremony I kept thinking, Slow down. I want to remember and relish these precious moments because I don't intend on having them again.

The following day (Saturday), Ben and I went over to my parent's place where his family, and my family including some out of town relatives were all gathered for breakfast and the opening of wedding presents. It was a fun way to spend time with the new in-laws and a great way to send us off on our honeymoon.

After opening all the gifts and hugging everyone goodbye, Ben and I loaded up in his parents little Toyota. We were on our way to Disneyland!

The honeymoon was fun. It was a long drive in a little car but so fun and so many memories. We saw a lot of great places. Our first hotel we stayed at once we crossed over into California was a Holiday Inn (which we decided from then on, that was the staple hotel). Woke up the next morning to fire alarms and firemen knocking on everyone doors. Apparently Californians don't know how to toast English muffins. :o) That was a fun memory. We got to stay in a beautiful hotel RIGHT across the street from Disneyland. We walked there every day. We strolled around Downtown Disney which became one of my favorite places to go. We ate at amazing places. Ben and I rarely go out to eat at nice places around here, only for special occasions. So going out for every meal was a real treat!

We went to Knott's Berry Farm too. I think we became Disney snobs because we weren't very impressed with Knott's after spending 3 days in Disney. Then we went to SeaWorld, where I had never been to before so that was a great time and we got some great pictures. Next was San Diego Zoo. I love zoos so I was really looking forward to this. We took a bus tour around the park first, that way we knew where certain animals were and would be able to walk to them later and spend as much time as we wanted with them. Again, we got some amazing pictures of the animals. The animals at the San Diego Zoo are vastly different than the ones here in Portland. They were so full of spunk and just so much more active. Their enclosures were large and well-kept. It made me sad for our animals here. Of course it could be the weather that makes the San Diego animals more peppy. Sun tends to do that with anything.

On our drive back home we took 101. We wanted to see the coast and possibly stop into some of the coastal cities along the way. We actually ran into some patches of snow but nothing too bad. A herd of elk were also grazing along the road, which caused us to do a radical U-Turn in the middle of the road just so we could go back and get some good pictures.

Wwe also got to meet up with a few people while we were down around the Disney area. We hung out with Kayla (long time friend of us both, and the guest book attendant at our wedding), Holly and Billy (one of Ben's groomsmen), and Andy (Ben's brother). Went out to dinner, went to movies, and other things...it was great to include others and not be the typical exlusive honeymooners.

Over all, it was a great time. We laughed a lot, probably from the hours on end of sitting, driving, and lack of sleep, you name it...the combination made us loony.

Let me just say, Ben and I are good on roadtrips for a while. :o)

One Month Ago Today

2008-01-07T09:52:00.000-08:00

...I was on my way to a nail appointment, one of the first tasks of my wedding day.

It's hard to believe Ben and I have been married for a month now. December flew by with the wedding, 2 week honeymoon to Disneyland, Christmas, and New Years..it was a crazy month.

Everyone asks how married life is, and so far it's been fantastic. It's great having my best friend with me all the time. We have already established some daily routines, one of which is drinking tea together and popping in a movie or one of our favorite TV shows. There are some challenging moments of course. Afterall we are two different people who have lived our lives individually for a long time and now trying to mesh together. But it's also fun learning to live with each other.

Ben or myself will probably post sometime soon more details of our road trip to Disneyland. We had a lot of fun and had some pretty memorable moments that we would love to share.

Stay tuned.

First of "The Lasts"

2007-11-30T06:57:00.000-08:00

Well, this next week will be full of "this will be the last time I _______ as a single person".

It started this morning with me saying to a co-worker "This is my last Friday as a single woman!!" It really did just hit me this morning. I will never have another single Friday. Not that any of my single Fridays before were anything special, it was just the realization.

I have a friend who has flown from her home in Virginia to be a bridesmaid in the wedding. She has been in town for the last month, staying at different homes and this weekend is my turn to have her stay with me. Oh, and this will be my last sleepover weekend with a friend as a single woman.

I know that this is kind of a melancholy post. Next Friday I will start saying "This is my first time I ________ as a married person!"

But until then, I am savoring all my lasts....

29 Days...

2007-11-08T14:48:00.000-08:00

until I am a wife.

Kinda scary but very exciting. I finally get to check the box that's labeled "Mrs."!

Unfortunately I haven't had a whole lot of time to really soak up the idea of being a grown up, married woman. Time, these days, has been taken up with all the nitty-gritty details of planning the big event.

I tell people sometimes about some wedding show I saw on TV a few months ago about a bride who went to great lengths to free up all her time in order to plan her wedding. She went as far as quitting her job! At the time I thought it was the most ridiculous thing I had heard someone do. But a couple weeks ago....I started to understand why she would do that.

Planning a wedding is STRESSFUL! So many details to accomplish, so many people to contact, always having to hound people to keep on top of their specific tasks, getting all schedules to line up, and still try to maintain a positive attitude. It's not easy. And I applaud Ben for hanging in there with me. I have not been a fun person to be around most of the time.

29 days. These past several months have seriously flown by.

I've been asked many times if I will miss being single. And to be honest...of course there are things I am going to miss. I can think of a few things off the top of my head. I'm going to miss the freedom of leaving at the drop of a hat to go meet up with a friend at anytime of day or night. I'm going to miss the ability to just make decisions for myself and not have to confer with anyone else for their input. I'm going to miss my alone time in my quiet apartment.

But I'm also really looking forward to sharing my life with someone else too. I'm looking forward to coming home and having my best friend there to talk to whenever I have something that I need to get off my chest. I will have that special person to go places with and do things with at any time. I will have a constant companion for the rest of my life and I'm thrilled about that.

29 days to practice my new signature.

Up until now I had always hoped I would marry a man with a short last name. Brookshire was just too long of a name for my taste but it's what I was dealt. But...my luck, I'm marrying a Christensen. Good thing I'm not a fan of hyphenating!

Starbucks Wisdom #280

2007-11-01T10:35:00.000-07:00

"You can learn a lot more from listening than you can from talking. Find someone with whom you don't agree in the slightest and ask them to explain themselves at length. Then take a seat, shut your mouth, and don't argue back. It's physically impossible to listen with your mouth open."

- John Moe
Radio host and author of Conservatize Me.

I'm An Aunt Again!!

2007-10-08T08:50:00.000-07:00

My sister had her second baby boy!!

Samuel Lee Fuller was born Sunday Oct. 7th at 7ish in the morning. He was 7lbs, 19inches.

I had been shopping with Tara Saturday night around 6:00, all the while she kept having strange feelings that she later found out were contractions but they felt different than they did with Jake so that's why she wasn't sure.

Later on Saturday night I got a call from mom 11:50 telling me Tara had gone to the hospital. I called Ben and we headed up to the hospital to wait. We waited with my parents until around 7:20 the next morning when we were told that baby had entered the world.

We got to go in and hold him. He is so different than Jake was. Jake was loud, crying, and bald. This one is so mellow and has dark hair! He is so sweet and quiet, and he has long fingers too. Hopefully he will become a pianist like Tara and me. :)

My family has a strange thing with the number 7.
Jake was born Aug. 7, I was born Sept. 7, Baby #2 was born Oct. 7, and Ben and I are getting married Dec. 7.

Who knows what will happen on Nov. 7!

Finally!

2007-09-28T08:17:00.000-07:00

Last night I was blessed with my first David Wilcox experience, thanks to Ben. And I really mean...blessed.

I had listened to Ben rave about David and how his concerts are nothing like you would ever experience anywhere else. So when Ben heard David was going to be in town he told me far in advance to reserve the date. Ben would play his songs on his mp3 player in the car while we were out driving and we'd sit back and listen to David play and tell stories that intertwined with his songs. I love that kind of story-telling acoustic music. It's relaxing and easy to listen to.

He writes such simple songs with great messages to them. I, who am not prone to tears, got a little misty when he sang about a car. That's right...I cried about a car.

It was about this car's life, but sung from the car's perspective. How it had the chance to be apart of its owners' lives. Their baby was brought home from the hospital in the car, stains from spilled drinks were on the carpet, tears from the kid who spilled the drinks on the seats, grass stains from soccer practices, a long lost Starburst that got smooshed in between the seats leftover from Halloween, pine needles from years of Christmas trees on its roof and so on. Then the song continues to when the kid grew up to be old enough to drive. The car then hopes the owners don't get rid of "the old and weathered" car and allow the kid to drive it. The ending line of the song, the car is wishing the teenager to drive safely and stay alive so that the car can continue to build sweet memories with the family.

I really did get teared up. It reminded me of my beloved International Scout that had been in our family since the beginning of time.

It was a '79 and I believe my parents got it when it was either brand new or very close to it. It was the last year that Scouts were made, so we wanted to hang on to it. That car...beast really...was such a trooper. It had been through everything with our family. Many drives to Sunriver, Mt. Hood in the snow, Christmas tree hunting, drives in the gravel and mud on the gun range with Dad. It had so many things wrong with it throughout the years but it still hung on.

Originally it was Dad's car, then Mom drove it for a long time after Dad got his Ford van, then when Tara was able to drive she drove the Scout for years, then it was my turn. By the time it came around to me I had so much love for this car, I never wanted to see it go. We gave it new seats, new paint job, new tires, new parts...it was my baby. It really became a member of the family. I drove it for about six years before it started to poop out. We could have spent a lot of money to keep it going, but it wasn't realistic. I needed a new car that was more reliable and safe. It killed me to think of giving it away. But it had to be done.

Dad posted the ad on the Internet and within a week probably, a man on the east coast saw it and contacted Dad. That was it. My Scout was gone. But to my surprise a few months after my Scout was taken away...we received an email from the happy new Scout owner. He was giving us an update on our baby. He had put some new parts in it and it was living happily on the east coast. It was bittersweet news. I was glad it was being taken such good care of by a genuine Scout lover, I just wish I could still have it with me so I could romp around freely in it on pretty much any terrain. I love my Ford Escape that I have now...but it's just not the same. Far from it.

So this song David sung about the car loving it's family just hit home with the Scout and I began to miss it and feel bad that we didn't still have it. Kind of silly I guess to those who may not have had a similar experience with a car like that.

Long story short...I LOVED the concert. It was an intimate group of people who all knew David's songs from years ago. It was so laid back. People would randomly shout out requests and he would jump at the opportunity to fulfill. I told Ben at intermission that I feel like I should be in my pj's with a pillow and blanket because it was such a cozy setting. Funny because after intermission that's exactly what David said. He could picture his audience with blankets and pillows and that would be great to him. It was a really great concert, probably my favorite that I've ever gone to. I don't think I remember laughing that much in any other concert. 2 1/2 hour long concert may seem long to some but Ben was right...I wouldn't want it to end.

I'm so glad I finally got to experience a David Wilcox concert. I will probably become the biggest concert critic and snob now. None will be quite like his. :)

I look forward to the next time he is in town for concert. I would love to see him again. Thank you to Ben for introducing his music to me.

Under the Weather

2007-09-10T13:10:00.000-07:00

Well, I've had probably the worst cold/sore throat/sinus/earache/headache combination that I can remember for the last few days. Perfect timing for my moving weekend. Thankfully everything went smoothly and quickly with the move, but I sure was not feeling good the entire time.

Monday is already here and I haven't had much time to catch up on sleep to help me get over this stupid cold. So I'm at work and know that I have to take something so my headache will go away and the sinus pressure won't bother me while I try to concentrate on being productive at work.

So I take a Tylenol Cold and Sinus, Non-drowsy. Or so it says. Here I am an hour or so after I pop the pills and I'm in a complete daze. My fingers are tingley and I am slightly sluring my words when I answer the company phones. Not so good. I'm definitely in a happy place, but I know it's not good when you type the same sentence multiple times on a fax cover. Ha!

Fun day!

Busy Busy Busy

2007-09-05T09:31:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile since I've last posted. Here is what's been going on:

Moving- This has been on my mind and the top priority recently. Erin and I had to be out of our apartment by Aug. 31st, but I am not able to move into my new apartment until Sept. 7th (my birthday). So consequently...I would be homeless for a week. And a big problem was, where I would store all of my furniture and clothes and shoes for a week? I certainly didn't want to load everything up and drop it off some place, only to turn around and load it all up again in a week. So to avoid all that, I found a place that was able to store my furniture in one trailer, parked, and locked in a garage for a week...for free! Not a bad deal.

Mom and Dad are in Indiana for several weeks (which I will explain further) so they offered their house for me to stay in and to store all my stuff until I have to move. Very thankful for that. My clothes however are all draped over the seats of my mom's minivan, still on the hangers. I'm getting a little tired of trekking out to the van every morning in my PJ's and slippers, standing outside the van trying to decide what to wear to work. What a sight I must be.

I will be moving my bed and clothes into the new apartment on Friday and start early Saturday morning moving everything else. I have lots of people helping me so it should go by quickly I'm hoping.

Wedding- Plans are moving along well. We recently decided on a photographer who is able to do both engagement and wedding in a package deal for an amazing price. Huge answer to prayer. I was getting pretty nervous that we weren't having any luck with photographers. We are very excited to meet with her. Ben's brother was the one who suggested checking out her website and wedding photo albums. So thank you Andy!

I'm waiting for my Mom to get back from Indiana to do anymore cake shopping. Mom really wanted to be apart of that. We did get a chance to visit a couple places and taste several yummy cakes before she left though, which was pretty fun because Tara and baby Jake were able to come with us. Jake had quite a sugar high that day and was very entertaining. :)

Ben and I just met with our premarital counselor this past Sunday for the first time. It was a very short meeting. Just answered a few questions, then we were handed "The Test". It's basically the Marital SATs. Fill in the bubbles with #2 pencils. Our counselor will get the results of the tests that Ben and I both took separately. Then the 3 of us will come together, discuss everything, and the fun begins.

Registering and Invitations are the next things on the list that need to be done soon.

Family- Most of my family members are from Indiana and we usually visit at least once every 1 or 2 years. My parents had been planning a trip to up-state New York for several months now. They wanted to travel all up in the scenic areas and possibly cross over to Canada. They got their passports updated and everything. They decided to stop in Indiana on their way to check in on the family. They left for Indiana on Aug. 22. They were going to stay there for about 8 days before heading to New York, and return home on Sept. 17.

My Grandma (Mom's mom) has been in bad health for quite some time now and getting a lot worse. She has been hallucinating constantly and her pace maker is due for replacement but at 91 years old, most of us don't think it's a wise idea to go through with a surgery like that. The doctors examined her and decided to try with the surgery which was scheduled for Sept. 4th. The medication they put her on was making her hallucinate even more than she normally does and she kept trying to pull out all her IVs. The doctors decided to wait and try again in a few days. But they will have to sedate her and there is a possibility of cardiac arrest. Poor mom is a wreck right now trying to deal with the whole situation and Grandma's weird mood swings and hallucinations. Mom and Dad had to cancel their whole New York trip and now they don't know when they will be home.

Fun- This past weekend Ben and I along with Erin, Lindsay, and Benny (with his puppy) went geocaching. So much fun! I had never done it before and I can't wait to do it again. Ben and I enjoyed it so much that we decided a GPS MUST be an item we register for. :) Ben has a good post on his blog about our geocaching experience, so you can check it out.

Ben and I also enjoyed some time with the family at Katy & Renjy's place. We had a BBQ and played the game Sequence. If you haven't played the game before (this weekend was my first time) here is the object of the game courtesy of Wikipedia: Sequence is a board-and-card game distributed by Jax Ltd., Inc.. It involves an average-sized playing board, on which are depicted two packs' worth of cards (minus the Jokers), two full standard decks, red, blue and green playing chips which total 135.
Players are dealt a certain number of cards (3-7 depending on the number of players), and then take turns to play these cards, placing a chip of their color on the corresponding card image on the board. The object of the game is to form a row of 5 chips (be it horizontally, vertically or diagonally) before the other players. If there are only two players, 2 sequences must be formed to win the game.
The Jacks fulfill a special role. If a player plays a two-eyed Jack, he or she may place a chip anywhere on the board (except of course on the wilds). If a one-eyed Jack is played, the player may remove an opposing player's token from anywhere.

Ben and I need to work on our silent communication a little bit more because we kept losing. :) But we pulled through and won the last game of the night.

Ben's been on a murder mystery kick, so we have been watching movies like: Clue, Murder by Death, Private Eyes, Pink Panther, and The Thin Man. They are all comedies so it is fun to watch them. I'm sure there will be many more movies on the list because Ben's been doing some research for more.

So that pretty much sums up everything that has been going on.

Answered Prayer!

2007-08-07T15:35:00.000-07:00

I finally found a place to live (and Ben later) and we have been officially approved as of today! HUGE answer to prayer and a big relief.

My lease with my current apartment is up on Aug. 31st and unfortunately I can't move in to the new place until Sep. 7th (my birthday). Don't know where I'll live for a week and I'm hating the fact that I'll have to be moving twice and on my birthday no less. But hey!...we have a home!!

Thank you to everyone who has been praying. We really appreciate it!

Moving

2007-07-31T13:37:00.000-07:00

Well, Erin and my lease is up at Rock Creek Landing at the end of August and I am very sad. I love this apartment so much, it's sad to say goodbye to it and to all the memories and fun times Erin and I have had here.

So now I'm on a search to find a place to live, not only on my own for 3 months before Ben and I get married, but after we are married too.

A glance at my calendar and it makes me all tense up inside. I have something going on every weekend of August. No time to spend a whole day apartment shopping. We have weddings, birthdays, and wedding planning to do. Seriously, how does time fly so fast?

Please pray that a housing opportunity of any kind, whether it be apartment, condo, townhouse, or house, open up soon. And that everything will go smoothly with this dreaded moving process.

Artist Block

2007-07-13T12:01:00.000-07:00

It's been a little too long since I've last done a piece of art. Seriously...about a year. I'm so rusty and I think I've put it off because I'm afraid of what the outcome may be after all this lost time of practice.

In the near future I want to tackle painting. So far I've only done sketches with the regular pencils, graphic pencils, watercolors pencils, pastels, and charcoal even...but I would love to master paints. Oil, watercolor, and acrylics. I want to do it all.

I would love to have a drafting table, a nice angled table to use for all my art projects. And a specific room in my house that would be devoted to art, my own studio. I'd love to have really nice art supplies and top quality brushes.

But all of this will have to wait. I have no extra room in the house. I have no money to purchase any of the supplies that are needed. So for now, I have my trusty pencils which have served me well for years.

I have long admired an artist by the name of Amy Brown. She lives in the Pacific Northwest and has been specializing in fairy art and other mystical creatures. Her work has been featured in movies, TV shows such as "My Name is Earl", and was contracted with Hot Topic in 2001 to be the artist for stickers and postcards that ended up expanding, so Hot Topic created a line of "Amy Brown Faery" items in their stores.

I have a few of her books that are full of her art. My art has always leaned more towards the mystical, ethereal, fantasy side anyway...so to see an artist with the same visions, it's exciting for me. She is on such a higher level with her art that it pushes me and inspires me.

Corgi Collage

2007-07-12T16:02:00.001-07:00

I love Pembroke Welsh Corgis. I hope one day I will be lucky enough to have one. :)

2007-07-10T14:00:00.000-07:00

Starbucks Wisdom

"Remember your dreams and fight for them. You must know what you want from life. There is just one thing that makes your dream become impossible: the fear of failure. Never forget your dreams. Your silent heart will guide you. Be silent now. It is the possibility of a dream that makes life interesting. You can choose between being a victim of destiny or an adventurer who is fighting for something important."

-Paulo Coelho

2007-07-09T09:51:00.001-07:00

This weekend I was able to sit out in the sun by our pool in the apartment complex. I haven't done this since last year. It was so great to finally make an effort to get tan (I have a lot of work ahead of me if I want to catch up to Ben). I work in an office all day long so it prevents me from getting any of the intense rays that I love. But I took full advantage this weekend. I actually even got in the pool! I never swim because I hate water. But it was so refreshing after cooking myself in the sun for a little over an hour. It's supposed to be HOT this week...so I'm going to make every effort to go home immediately after work each day to catch the last remaining rays!

The Power of Words

2007-06-29T09:55:00.000-07:00

Several blogs I frequently visit recently have had some similar posts. I guess I have to include my own blog in this group as well, since the subject matter has been on my mind as of late.

Communication.

I have never been very good with communicating. I have thoughts, opinions, and information going through my head all the time, but when asked "What are you thinking?"...blank. I don't know how to put my disjointed thoughts into words so that the person asking the question can understand, and also explain my thoughts in a way that I don't sound like a complete mental case. I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels this way.

Ben often asks me this question, "What are you thinking?" He tries so hard to get me to open up and really communicate, no matter how small and insignificant the thoughts in my head may be. My family struggled with communication...we are challenged that way. So to break away from that and really strive to put a voice to my thoughts has been a huge stretch. I get frustrated with myself and also frustrated with Ben..."Why do you ask me this question? When I have something to say...I'll say it".

But in reality I often don't. I have to be poked and pushed to speak my mind.

I have never wanted to be the person that just spews words just for the sake of speaking. I know people like this. When this is the case, more often than not, these words can be hurtful and undeserved. This is the last thing I would want so I find myself guarding my words. When I have opinions running through my mind...I keep them there. If I really feel the need to voice them, I will make sure they are well put together so they come out of my mouth concise, accurate, appropriate and courteous. Even though I may be passionate about a topic...I never want to offend.

A few verses that have impacted my life and are my philosophy:

"When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise." Prov. 10:19
"He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin." Prov. 13:3
"If any one considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight reign on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless." James 1:26
"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification." Romans 14:19
"Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing." Romans 12:18

******************************************************************************
Throughout this past year Ben and I have learned a lot from each other about communication. I have learned he wishes for transparency and an openness with me. While I have learned I wish for the same thing, I find it difficult for me to give him that so freely. It's not that I don't want to, it's just one of those life hurdles that I have to make my way over.

Communication is important in a good marriage. When I think of the ideal marriage I see the deepest connection two people can possibly have. I knowledge of each other and a bond that is so great it almost can't compare to any other union, exactly how our relationship should be with Christ. But in order for this union to be all that it needs to be, it all comes back to that big word: communication.

How can two people get to that place of deep understanding when there isn't clear communication...from both partners?

In the process of attaining this so desired union...I know very well that some unattractive qualities I unfortunately possess will likely rear their ugly heads along the way. But I am so very thankful that Ben is patient. We have made some great progress in this area of our relationship that I have great hope we will only continue to grow more and more connected in the way God designed marriage to be.

Progress

2007-06-20T09:43:00.000-07:00

I realized this morning that I haven't posted in awhile and figured it was time for an update.

The only thing that consumes my time other than work...are wedding plans. Things are coming along really well.

The church is reserved, the reception site is booked, order of ceremony has been decided, music and performers have been selected, florist has been selected, and pre-marital counseling will begin mid July. Everything seems to be on track.

I went with 3 of my 5 bridesmaids to try on bridesmaid dresses. Wow! That took no time at all. I expected to be shopping for hours and hours...maybe even days. It was the 3rd dress Jess tried on and then I told Katy and Tara, "That's it! Everyone try that one on!". Pretty painless. Now all my girls need to order the dress and we'll be set.

I have been dress shopping, tried on at least 20 different dresses and I think I've found the one. It's a very exciting thing to stand in front of the mirror in the dress you will get married in. The assistant at the bridal store was a HUGE help. I enjoyed being with her, she made a potentially stressful day into a fun and light-hearted experience. 10 or so dresses came and went...then she brought this one in. It didn't look like anything I had been drawn to before. I put it on, and it was perfect. Everything about it was me. I stood in front of the mirror...on a little stool to get the full effect...for about 15 minutes. A pretty good sign that it's a keeper. :)

I will be meeting with my florist, Cheryl, the 2nd or 3rd week in July to discuss the flowers. I have a pretty good idea of what I want so that could help get the ball rolling. I'm looking forward to working with her during this time. I've seen the arrangements she has done and I know she will be amazing.

I've been doing some price checking on invitation ideas. I know what I like, but they are too expensive so I'm hoping that getting the supplies to make them myself will be worth it. We'll see though.

One thing I'm looking forward to is the cake tasting. :) Cake isn't my most favorite dessert but it's the wedding staple pretty much. I know what I want it to look like...just have to figure out the flavors. I think Ben and I will have some fun doing that.

Ben and I have decided where we are honeymooning. There are a couple destination points so we have been talking through the details to make it all happen. It involves a road trip which I was a little skeptical of in the beginning but I'm really looking forward to it. Road trips with Ben are so much fun and like Ben said "we will make so many memories".

I believe that is all I have right now. More to come!

In an Oven

2007-05-30T15:52:00.000-07:00

AC is broken in our office today. Great timing I must say...on a 90+ degree day.

I swear this happens every year.

Funny things...air conditioners. They don't seem to work on the hottest days of the year (at least in my office), they conveniently poop out on us. But they work perfectly on those winter months when they have no reason to be on (thank you to all the ladies with hot flashes..you freeze me out of the place!) :o)

It's a continuous puzzlement to me.

Excuse me while I go stick my head in the fan....

Seesaw of Life

2007-05-23T12:56:00.000-07:00

People often say they are thankful for their past, after all it made them who they are today, right? And if given the choice to go back in time and change anything..they would opt not to. I often say that too. Because in a sense it's true. Those hardships, that everyone usually goes through, built some backbone, confidence, and independence that otherwise I might not have gained.

I love my sister. She is one of the greatest people in my life. We are alike in so many ways, it's almost scary. But we have some very obvious differences too. And those differences were the cause of some early life hardships, and I'm still carrying them to this day.

Tara is a talker. She's known as that. It's her gift. She is very engaging in a conversation and also entertaining to watch as she talks. I am the listener. Probably because Tara did all my talking for me while I was growing up..I didn't feel a need to speak up. I'm an observer. I like to watch people, I like to read them and figure out what's going on in their head at the moment. These attributes have heightened my sensitivity to people, and their feelings, and how they feel towards me. I want and desire everyone to be happy and to get along.

Back to the issue of: Tara is the talker, I'm the listener.

That's kind of how I was defined. I remember 10 or so years ago, my family had flown back to Indiana for my Grandmother's birthday. There were many of my distant family members at the party who I had never met before. I remember Mom leading me over to one of her cousins, "This is Amber, the quiet one".

Maybe some people don't see that as a hurtful comment. But it was a very painful jab, because it wasn't the first time and it certainly wasn't the last. Since when does "quiet" become a negative character? I always thought it was a good thing. No one likes loud, obnoxious, rowdy people right? They come off as immature, abrasive, and unapproachable, at least to me they do.

These comments, such as the "she's the quiet one", made me second guess myself, my character, and the way people viewed me. Was I wrong to be quiet? As an 11 year old...it was devastating to me to think I could be a disappointment to my parents if they expected me to be more like Tara. I wasn't Tara. My sensitivity grew and I found myself extremely defensive whenever I felt my "quiet" nature was under attack. I wanted to defend the person God made me to be. Why did I need to change?

This is where that independence kicked it. I wasn't Tara. I was determined to be who I wanted to be and who God created me to be. I became my own person. Somewhat rebellious at times...but I was making my own life and I didn't want to be compared anymore. I started making my own decisions. I moved out of my parents' house right out of high school. I don't even remember asking if this was okay with them or not. But at that point, it didn't matter to me. I made the arrangements on my own and I was OUT.

Since then I've made some big decisions, on my own and I'm proud of that. But recently it has been brought to my attention that I need to become a little less independent now. I'm getting married this year and this independence I have can cause some difficulties. I'm struggling to find the balance. I can't make all the decisions on my own, like I'm so used to doing. I have to confer with Ben and it's not always easy to do because most of the time I already have my mind made up. I have someone else's needs and feelings to think about, it's not just me anymore.

Balancing is tricky

My Weakness

2007-05-18T09:23:00.000-07:00

Starbucks.

It's a beautiful thing. Especially this morning. I had a little bit of a late night last night and the morning was NOT welcomed. I drug myself into work and I looked like a wreck. In my mind, the only remedy was Starbuck's.

So during my morning break I busted up to the Starbuck's up the road. I love that they put one right by our work on Sylvan Hill. So convenient. Bad for the wallet...but sacrifices must be made to be effective at work, right?

I decided to try something different. When I find a good drink that I like, I usually don't stray too much. I'm not a natural coffee lover. It took me awhile to convert. But it was definitely worth the effort. I can tolerate a lot of new drinks but I like to stick to a couple favorites. My typical choices: Vanilla Bean Frappuccino in the summer, White Chocolate Mocha in the winter.

But this time I needed more of a kick to it. I went for a Java Chip Frapp. The perfect blend of dark roast coffee (double strength), chocolate chips, crushed ice and topped with whipped cream and drizzled with chocolate syrup.

Amazing! I'm hooked now.

Bring on the coffee jitters!

Camping...Christensen Style

2007-05-14T13:20:00.000-07:00

Last Friday Ben and I along with Katy and Renjy piled into the car and headed out to Cascade Locks for a fun-filled weekend of camping. We were on our way to meet up with Ben's parents (and Buddy the dog too), who recently purchased a camper and were eager to make use of it.

We got to the KOA camp site just as the night was setting in and rushed to set our tents up before all the light was gone. I was a little rusty at putting up my tent. It's been years since the days of backpacking with Dad and Tara...took me a little longer than it used to.

After the tents, we wandered over to Dean and Becki's site to sit around the warm camp fire and chat. It was great. I love spending spending time with my future in-laws. Camping is one of my favorite things. I love that I'm coming into a family that loves to do the outdoorsy things I did while I was a "little pip-squeak" (as Dad always called me).

Friday night was freezing! I was so cold, all alone in my little tent. Smelly tent too. I don't think it had been set up since those old backpacking days. It had that musty smell to it. I woke up the next morning to Buddy hugging my head and licking my face. And Katy and Renjy singing Michael W. Smith songs from their tent. I like waking up early, I usually consider myself a morning person, most of the time. But I'm not used to a dog in my face...or singing in the morning for that matter. At that particular moment, I'm definitely not a morning person.

That day the campsite managers cooked a pancake breakfast for everyone. Afterwards Katy and Renjy decided to go on a hike. Ben and I would have gone but I forgot to pack hiking shoes. So Ben and I stayed in the camper, watched TV, drank tea, read a book, talked with Becki, and took Buddy for a walk. When Katy and Renjy came back we roasted marshmallows and hot dogs. We tore down the tents because we didn't want to freeze again. So we all piled into the camper for our last night there. Good thing we did because it began to rain. We played some card games, Skip-Bo, and Apples to Apples. We never got around to Settlers though. That night, all stretched out in our sleeping bags nice and snug in the camper, we put on an old movie, "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner" before we all fell asleep.

The next morning we had a quick breakfast and packed everything back up into Renjy's car and headed home.

It was a fun weekend. I kinda forgot how fun camping was. Now I can't wait to go again.

And the Fun Begins....

2007-05-10T13:36:00.000-07:00

Now that the thought of being engaged has set in a little more...hours of gazing at the sparkly on my left hand have faded into long minutes now; it is time to get down to business. The business of planning a wedding.

I'm excited to start this process, I mean it's the day EVERY little girl dreams about. I have visions of what I would like the sanctuary to look like, the flowers, the bridesmaid dresses, my dress, the cake, the music....everything has been thought of. Now it's time to make it happen.

I actually bought a wedding planner from Target online and can't wait to use it.

It includes:

• Calendar section has blank monthly pages for a year of planning
• Suggestions for timing regarding when to book vendors
• Space for budgeting
• A place for keeping receipts
• Recording attire suggestions
• Honeymoon planning tips
• Tabbed pages for guest list
• Invitation ideas
• Ceremony details to help keep me on task
• Enclosed stickers and flags to mark important dates
• Plastic slide-in pages to hold business cards
• A zip pouch that stashes fabric swatches, receipts and more

Can you tell I'm just a little weird about organizational notebooks? I'm so excited!

This could be a really fun experience, but planning a wedding could also be a dreadful experience as well. I haven't had a wedding before and I only plan on doing this once...I want it to be perfect. In order to do that, it would be wise to listen to other's experiences, how certain things worked for them or what they would have done differently and so on.

I've heard horror stories of people (people who weren't even directly involved in the wedding) just pouring out unsolicited advice and opinions to the point where the bride felt bombarded and her wedding seemingly morphed into something that was not what she envisioned for HER big day. That is my fear. I really want this whole ordeal to be enjoyable for not only me but for everyone and I'm nervous about people unintentionally taking over.

I do welcome advice, don't misunderstand. I do value and take what people say into consideration. But only to an extent. I'm a pretty stubborn person and when I have a vision...I usually don't budge too much. Ben can attest to that. :)

Ben and I are SO blessed to have a great support system and so many people praying for us, I know everything will turn out just fine. After all, it's God who needs to be the focus of on our wedding day.

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Spaghetti Factory

2007-04-30T08:44:00.000-07:00

Last night Ben and I had plans to go to The Old Spaghetti Factory downtown on the river for a nice dinner. I was so excited for my spinach tortellini with Alfredo sauce.

Well, we are on our way, driving down 26 when Ben gets a call on his cell. It's apparently his boss (aka Renjy in this scenario). I pipe broke at the church and his "boss" wanted him to come by to help them figure out how to fix it.

I'm thinking, "Are you kidding me? Call a frickin plumber! We are going to dinner!"

We pull into the church parking lot and head over to South Village and I see Ben's mom off in the distance.

"Weird, why would she be here? Must be a really big problem with this pipe thing if she's down here."

I'm totally clueless sometimes.

Ben told me to wait in the car while he went to go check the situation out. He came back about 5 minutes later and said that I should come in and wait, it shouldn't take too long.

We start walking down the bark dust walk way that heads to South Village. Tiki torches were lining the walkway and I was racking my brain, trying to remember if those torches were a new addition to the landscaping.

Again, clueless.

Then we get to the bridge that crosses over the creek. Rose petals blanketed the entire rest of the walkway that lead up to South Village. We get to the sliding glass door of the house and I stepped inside.

"Wow!"

Candles EVERYWHERE. On the floor, on the shelves, on the window sills, everywhere. Petals all over the floor. Pictures taped to the walls and hanging from the ceiling. It was amazing.

We made our way to a table that was situated in the corner of the room next to the fire in the fireplace. On it was my spinach tortellini and Ben's Cobb salad. And two red roses were laying on the table next to our plates.

We sat at the table, eating, talking, reminiscing, and laughing. Next Ben handed me our ice cream dessert and led me to the couch in the room while he turned on the big screen TV. Music started to play and the slide show began of pictures of me and pictures of us together over the past several years. I loved it!

Then he pulled a chair up in front of the couch facing me and pulled out his guitar. Ben had been working on a song for me since the early part of our relationship and I've only gotten to hear part of this song. The last part he told me I wasn't to hear until a very significant day. :)

After he finished the song, he pulled a box out of his pocket, a box that I knew contained a sparkly object of great significance. He got on one knee. I can't tell you everything he said. I was in a blur, on a cloud, so many things running through my head, smiling like crazy, waiting for my moment to say YES! But I do remember him saying "I love you. Amber Kellene Brookshire...will you marry me?"

my moment came...."YES!!"

I have to say, the night went far beyond anything I could ever imagine. The Old Spaghetti Factory would have been great...but this? This was perfect.

I'm engaged!! tee hee.

Happy Anniversary!!!

2007-04-19T10:21:00.000-07:00

For My Sister....

2007-04-18T14:51:00.000-07:00

Growing Up is Scary

2007-04-16T11:45:00.000-07:00

There are going to be quite a few changes in my life in the very near future and it has me thinking about a lot of things.

Finances, 401k, Profit Sharing Plan, Mutual Funds, Dividends, Mortgages, Loans...ah! These are things that my Dad has always pushed me to further understand throughout my life. I'm so thankful he did because I do have somewhat of a grasp on each one of those...I don't know a whole lot but I'm on my way of becoming more educated as time goes by.

Ben and I went over to Katy and Renjy's new house this weekend to play Settlers. It is amazing how God has blessed them. Not quite yet married for a year and they already own a house. A real house. With a patio and a yard!

That's such a huge accomplishment in my mind. Owning a house is big to me. Almost overwhelming to think about all the stuff that comes with owning a house. All the money you have to put into it to keep it up makes my checking account cry. Don't get me wrong, I want to own a house. I'd LOVE to have my own place. I just feel overwhelmed sometimes with all the responsibilities that I have to take on soon and all the money that will be involved too.

Plus my life is full of unknowns right now. I don't know if I will still be in the same country in the next 5 years. I have to be smart about the decisions I make.

Where should my money go that will be more beneficial in the long run?
Living in India is a huge possibility in my future...should owning a house be on my mind now or should it wait until I'm for sure back to stay in the U.S.?
Should I rent an apartment?
Or should I rent a duplex or a house?
What are the pros and cons to each?
I want a dog so badly. But can I afford a dog right now?
Would it be fair to get one, then find out in the next few years I will be moving out of the country?
I probably won't be able to take it with me.
I want to go to so many places in the world...but when and how will that all fit into my life and budget?
When should I have kids? Kids are expensive.
Will I ever be financially stable enough to be responsible for another human being?...in the time-frame I have in mind.

These are things that have been creeping up in my mind recently. My poor head needs a break!

Little Gifts

2007-04-04T13:27:00.000-07:00

I never used to like kids. I was one of those people that got incredibly annoyed at crying babies on planes. And God was just plain mean because somehow...I would be the one to sit right next to the wailing infant.

I was always uncomfortable around babies and small kids even. I didn't know what to do with them or how to entertain them. I was afraid of holding a baby because I didn't want to make it cry or drop it even. I went through a big chunk of my life thinking that I didn't want to have children. But again...God thinks He's pretty funny because He put a guy in my life who loves kids, wants lots of kids, and IS a kid himself sometimes. :o)

Kids are inevitable apparently.

My feelings towards babies and kids have changed dramatically over that past couple of years. My nephew Jake was born August 7, 2005 and ever since then..my world hasn't been the same. I love that little guy more than anything. It's fun to watch a little person who is new to the world. Watching them discover EVERYTHING is so fun. Their fascination in the smallest things is amazing. Life is so simple at that age.

Jake is just now starting to really say things. He can say the entire alphabet. He will pick out all the letters of the alphabet and say them "D!", "S!", "Q!" with such enthusiasm. But when he says " I wuv oo"..it melts my heart. When I go over to Tara's for sister time, I look forward to the "thump, thump, thump, thump, thump" of Jake's little feet running to greet me at the door. His finger always pointed at me and saying "AM!" with his toothy little grin. He hasn't quite gotten the "Auntie" part down but "Am" is good enough for me now.

I guess something switched inside me. Now when I hear crying babies...I smile because it reminds me of Jake. I think of Jake as a little gift that God put in my family's life. Jake seemed to slow the pace down. My family spends more time together because everyone wants to be around him. He's the glue. My sister and I can act like complete dorks trying to put on a show for Jake, dancing around, singing at the top of our lungs, making funny faces and he will think it's the most hilarious thing. I love it.

Life is just so much more fun-loving and interesting when you have a little person in it.

For Ben

2007-03-30T14:25:00.000-07:00

Does a certain movie pop in your head when you see this?

The Shade of Green

2007-03-22T13:20:00.000-07:00

Money has been on my mind a lot lately.

I wish I had more of it so that I would be able to do more things.

I have always wanted to travel ever since I could remember. I loved the thought of having money to travel all over the world and to stay at nice resorts located on beautiful beaches. But recently I desire money in a different capacity. Missions.

I want to travel to all those places that I've dreamed of going all my life, but as a missionary for God.

There is quite a list:

Morocco
Tanzania
Uganda
Rwanda
Kenya
Egypt
Israel
Lebanon
Costa Rica
Jamaica
Dominica
Brazil
Fiji
Australia
France
Italy
Austria
Germany
Greece
Italy
Spain
Russia
India
Sri Lanka

I've wanted to travel to many of these places for vacation but some I feel I need to travel to for mission purposes. I realize I probably won't make it to all the places I have listed, though it is nice to have goals written out.There are so many unreached people throughout the world and I know I can't do it all but my heart goes out to every one of them.

Back to the money issue.

I recently came back from India and I still miss it so much. I long to go back so badly but why can't I go back? Money. Even though a huge chunk of the required amount for mission trips is from donations, there is still quite a bit that has to come out-of-pocket. I won't be able to go back to India for another 2 years probably. Even longer for me to go to Africa (my second most desired place to go). It kills me that money is the reason for the delays.

But then I have to honestly think to myself...what if I did have all the money that it takes? Would I really use it for the right reasons? A couple years ago I would have probably said "No. I wouldn't." But now, after my experience in India...I have a passion for the lost and the unreached. If only I had the money to just pack up and go to these places to share Christ! I would do it in a heartbeat.

Maybe having less, is God's lesson to me. It's so much more humbling and moving to know that you don't have enough and then God provides in miraculous ways.

Sleepy

2007-03-22T09:44:00.000-07:00

I woke up at 3:00 this morning...wide awake. Finally at 4:00 I fell back asleep but when my alarm went off at 5:45 I woke up feeling completely thrashed. Why? I went to bed early last night...for once! But it's not just this past night. I am constantly tired. I don't know why.

Erin has come in to our apartment MANY times and found me completely dead to the world on the couch. She's even tried having conversations with me but I don't wake up. I fall asleep so easily when I watch movies with Ben, but it probably doesn't help that he gets off work at 10:00pm every night and being the geniuses that we are..start a 2 hour movie and then I wake up the next morning for work confused as to why I'm dragging.

Even on the weekends I feel so exhausted and I just don't understand why. Some people say I should go to the doctor because it could be mono or something like that. I really don't think it's that. I don't have any of the other symptoms that come with those. At least I don't think I do.

Right now as I sit at work, my eyes feel so heavy. I feel the strong urge to crawl under my desk and take a little siesta.

Zzzzzz.......

Tag! I'm it

2007-03-21T09:05:00.000-07:00

1. Go to Wikipedia and type in your birthday, month and day only.
2. List 3 events that occurred on that day.
3. List 2 important birthdays.
4. List 1 death.
5. List a holiday or observance. (if any)

Birthday: September 7th

Events

#1- 1921, In Atlantic City New Jersey, the first Miss America Pageant is held.

#2- 1979, ESPN makes its debut.

#3- 1996, In Las Vegas, Tupac Shaker is shot several times after attending a boxing match. He later died in a hospital on Sept. 13.

Birthdays

#1- 1533, Queen Elizabeth I of England

#2- 1936, Buddy Holly

Death

#1- 2006, Robert Earl Jones (father of James Earl Jones).

Holiday

#1- 1822, Brazil's Independence day (from Portugal).

Bond

2007-03-20T13:41:00.000-07:00

I have never been much of a Bond fan. I've watched several Bond movies in the past but never really understood the facination people have with them. My mom LOVES Bond movies...especially the ones with Pierce.

On Thanksgiving weekend this past year, my family + Ben stayed in Sunriver. While we were there Ben and I joined my sister and her husband to go see the new Bond movie, Casino Royale, that had just opened in theaters. Tara and I were practically drooling the whole movie. I think Daniel Craig was an excellent choice for the new Bond. Tough, muscular, intense, and humorous. A great combination for Bond.

I admit...I'm now hooked on Bond. At least this one.

Casino Royale recently came out on DVD and I was one of the ones to rush immediately to the store to pick it up, of course...the 2-Disc Widescreen Special Edition. I just can't settle for anything less.

I watched it twice this last weekend, including all the special features. :) I'm officially a Bond Fan.

I Prefer the Casket

2007-03-13T15:01:00.000-07:00

"According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you are better off in the casket than doing the eulogy."

~Jerry Seinfeld

This is one of my favorite quotes of Jerry's. Probably because it is totally me. I HATE public speaking. I always have and I probably always will.

I have to get up in front of people this weekend and talk about my India trip and how it impacted me or a story that sums up the experience...in 2 minutes. Yes I know, 2 minutes isn't that much to get all worked up about and it's not worth getting nervous about. But I WILL get nervous! If it's anything that has to do with getting up in front of people...I would rather be 6 feet underground at that point. Plus, how can I possibly describe a trip like this in 2 minutes. I wouldn't even want to do that. It leaves too much out.

So, if you want to come and listen about the team's India experience, 7:00pm on Saturday is when it will be.

Off to dig my hole...

Yoga Fun

2007-03-12T10:08:00.000-07:00

I recently joined my roommate Erin in regular yoga sessions. We do it in our living room, in front of our TV, to DVDs with instructors who stand on beautiful cliffs in Hawaii. As if the amazing scenery will help relax and easy the pain of the abnormal twists and bends they put us through on these DVDs. I complain now...only because I'm really sore. :o) I really do love yoga. It is truly relaxing, minus the mantras and a-uhmmmm chants. You don't realize how simple poses can really work muscles when you hold them for long periods of time and really focus on working a specific area of your body. Balancing during some of these poses can be both beneficial and humorous. The instructors make it look so easy and fluid as they roll from one pose into another. Me?...not quite so graceful. I'm sure I will get there, some day.

Various Poses:
Mountain
Triangle
Warrior 1 & 2
Standing Forward Bend
Downward Facing Dog
Full Boat
Bow
Wheel
Bridge
Cobra
and Erin and my favorite....Corpse Pose

There are many more poses but these are the ones that stick out in my mind. Probably because they attribute directly to my current aches and pains. My hamstrings curse the Standing Forward Bend. And my poor abs are so cramped from the Wheel Pose and the Bridge Pose. I'm hoping my body will heal soon and these moves will become a little bit easier and more enjoyable. :o)

Namaste

Work Frustration

2007-03-06T09:02:00.000-08:00

I am the commission accountant for an insurance brokerage firm in Portland. With that comes a lot of stress and frustration, but for the most part I enjoy it. I know that what I do is important for the company.

Well..yesterday was just one of those days that I HATE my job.

I work on commission statements all day long. Our company receives statements from health insurance carriers (HealthNet, Regence, Kaiser, LifeWise, Providence...etc.) that contain client payment information; such as, name, policy number, agent who represented them and therefore gets commission off the client, client's plan name, premium, and percentage of commission of the premium that needs to go to the correct broker for that client sale. There are around 50 different agents that are affiliated with our company.

Once I get the statements, I have to enter this information into a complicated computer program called Captiva. It is supposed to be the latest and greatest accounting program for businesses like ours. But it is new..and there are some glitches in it that we need either fix or just get used to. Because of the complicated program...one statement can take me 6-8 hours to enter and reconcile, some take me 1-2...just depends. Our company receives well over 40 statements a month. All the statements that are received in the beginning of the month need to be completely entered into the program by the end of that same month.

Well, yesterday our company's main accountant told me that Captiva is printing out the reports incorrectly, so the total of the statements aren't reconciling to the total amount of the commission check received for that statement. She gave be 5 statements back....to redo. That's over 10 hours of work, based on the certain statements she gave back.

I about died. It's not that I'm entering information in incorrectly because all of my statements reconciled perfectly. I've never given an incorrect statement to our accountant. The only thing I can think of is the actual program is messing up...or the person that took over my position while I was in India for a few weeks did something unintentionally that messed up its calculations. The point is...I have to go back and redo work that I know is correct and I just can't figure out why it's not working.

I'm off to go do some number crunching!

Night with the Girls

2007-03-04T17:41:00.000-08:00

Bridget, Pama, Erin, and I all went to the Rascal Flatts concert Friday and we had a great time. I love nights out with the girls. We always have so much fun. Erin and I met at Pama's house and caught the Max at Quatama. Then Bridget hopped on at Sunset and we all made our way downtown to The Rose Garden.

Our seats were located right in front of the suite level. So we had the really nice food, the bar, and nice carpet floors. Not too bad! Jason Aldean opened up the night with a few songs. He's a fairly new artist, so there was only one or two songs I recognized. Then the crowd went wild when Rascal Flatts finally came to the stage. From then on it was a lot of singing along, little dancing in the cramped quarters we were in, clapping, and laughing. Great time.

Afterwards we fought our way through the crowd to get to the Max stop. We decided to hang back and catch one of the later rides to avoid all the people. We made a split second decision to jump off right at Rock Bottom to get some food. After we had some food and drinks, we realized that there was only one last Max ride left before it shut down for the night and we needed to get ready to jump on.

Well, we made it. At 1:18am..the last ride came but it didn't pull away until around 1:30 for some reason. In the mean time we enjoyed a nice puking show from a girl that was completely wasted on the Max.

Our stop was at Sunset but we all, but Bridget, needed to go on to Hillsboro. Bridget was a sweetie and said she would take us all back to Pama's and then she would turn around and head home to Salem. Thank you Bridget!

That was our night. We had a great time, we made it home safe, and looking forward to future concerts with the girls.

Love you guys!

Concert Tonight!!

2007-03-02T09:06:00.000-08:00

RASCAL FLATTS CONCERT TONIGHT!!!!

so excited :o)

Summer Fun

2007-02-28T09:30:00.000-08:00

I'm more of a winter person but there are several things that I love to do that are more for summer weather. So here are some things on my list that I'm looking forward to when the weather permits:

Hike up Multnomah Falls
Canoe on the Deschutes in Sunriver
Go fishing for my first time
Spend long days at the beach
Go to Edgefield Manor for BBQ's out on the lawn
Backpack along the Salmon River
Go to Pike's Place and have a seafood lunch on the water
Sit out in the sun...reading a good book
Drink fresh fruit smoothies on a hot day
Stay in a yurt in Lincoln City
Go to outdoor concerts
Get tan!

Starbuck's Quote # 201

2007-02-26T13:38:00.000-08:00

Complex problems defy simple solutions. One cannot end poverty by giving money to every poor person, nor is the world cleaned up if everyone rode their bikes to work instead of driving. We need to commit to a total solution for our perceived problems. We need to also remember that most solutions hurt people too. What or who we hurt and who or what we fix is always the tough part of the equation.

-John Adamski
Starbucks customer from Corvallis, Oregon

God's Message to Women

2007-02-26T12:55:00.000-08:00

"When I created the heavens and the earth, I spoke them into being. When I created man, I formed him and breathed life into his nostrils. But you, woman, I fashioned after I breathed the breath of life into man because your nostrils are too delicate. I allowed a deep sleep to come over him so I could patiently and perfectly fashion you.

Man was put to sleep so that he could not interfere with the creativity. From one bone I fashioned you. I chose the bone that protects man's life. I chose the rib, which protects his heart and lungs and supports him, as you are meant to do. Around this one bone I shaped you. I modeled you. I created you perfectly and beautifully.

Your characteristics are as the rib, strong yet delicate and fragile. You provide protection for the most delicate organ in man, his heart. His heart is the center of his being; his lungs hold the breath of life.The rib cage will allow itself to be broken before it will allow damage to the heart. Support man as the rib cage supports the body. You were not taken from his feet, to be under him, nor were you taken from his head, to be above him. You were taken from his side, to stand beside him and be held close to his side.

You are my perfect angel, my beautiful little girl. You have grown to be a splendid woman of excellence, and my eyes fill when I see the virtues in your heart. Your eyes are beautiful. Your lips, how lovely when they part in prayer. Your nose, so perfect in form, your hands so gentle to touch. I've caressed your face in your deepest sleep; I've held your heart close to mine. Of all that lives and breathes, you are the most like me. Adam walked with me in the cool of the day and yet he was lonely. He could not see me or touch me. He could only feel me. So everything I wanted Adam to share and experience with me, I fashioned in you: my holiness, my strength, my purity, my love, my protection and support.

You are special because you are the extension of me. Man represents my image - Woman, my emotions. Together, you represent the totality of God.

So man, treat woman well. Love her, respect her, for she is fragile. In hurting her, you hurt me. What you do to her, you do to me. In hurting her, you only damage your own heart, the heart of your Father, and the heart of her Father.

Woman, support man. In humility, show him the power of emotion I have given you. In gentle quietness show your strength. In love, show him that you are the rib that protects his inner self."

What am I Doing to Help?

2007-02-26T12:39:00.000-08:00

I watched Invisible Children again recently. Every time I watch these stories I feel so compelled to do something more with my life. I feel as though I'm not doing enough, there's always something more I could do. Those of you who may not know what this is all about, well...let me tell you:

In the spring of 2003, University of Southern California film school graduates Jason Russell and Bobby Bailey, and their friend Laren Poole, traveled to Africa intending to film the humanitarian crisis in Sudan. They found themselves in the northern part of Uganda, witnessing the horrors of a 20 year rebellion in which most of the combatants, an estimated 80% to 90%, are children.

They discovered that children as young as eight were being kidnapped nightly from their homes by a rebel group called the Lord's Resistance Army. To avoid capture, the children would wake themselves in the middle of the night, while it was very dark and travel for miles to evade the rebels. The children who are abducted are desensitized to the horror of violence and killing as they themselves are turned into vicious killers. Some escape and hide in constant fear; most remain captive and group into adulthood with no education other than life in the bush and fighting in a guerrilla war.

"Invisible Children" highlights what the community refers to as "night commuters," the thousands of children who migrate out of fear from the villages to nearby towns each night to avoid the LRA abductions. They sleep in public places, vulnerable and without supervision, and in a constant state of fear.

The interesting thing is, Jason, Bobby, and Laren had no idea their rough documentary would make it into the public eye, let alone make such a large impact on the community. They first screened "Invisible Children" in 2004 for friends and family and soon expanded to high schools, colleges, and organizations. The film has sparked a movement to bring assistance to the children of northern Uganda.

In September 2004, the filmmakers formed a nonprofit organization called Invisible Children, Inc. to coordinate the efforts of those who want to help. The organization has started an education program and a bracelet campaign that provides employment to Ugandans and helps fund the education program.

There is a website you can go to to learn more about this organization and be apart of the bracelet campaign. With each bracelet, there is a story of a different child. And all the money goes to aid this movement. I encourage you to be apart of it too: www.invisiblechildren.com

I have 3 bracelets already. Wear them...and remember.

Missing India

2007-02-23T15:30:00.000-08:00

Yes, I am back from India. I didn't want to leave. I remember sitting next to Ben on the plane ride from LA to Portland, about ready to land at PDX...I turned to him and said "I already miss it".

India was beautiful. I had an amazing time. I saw so many things that I had never seen before and some of it pretty shocking. The people were friendly, traffic was chaotic by American standards, cows and dogs everywhere, people walking in and throughout the traffic, camels walking alongside the roads, people sleeping on the sidewalks, women tapping on the car windows at stoplights begging for money or food. The first day we got to India, after Blair and I got settled in our room and I looked out of the hotel window, three floors up from the street, and I said to Blair "I feel like I'm watching National Geographic". I seriously felt like I was living out a picture that I've seen in that magazine.
There are so many things I could write about. But it is difficult to put an experience like that into words. India is a place where you just have to go...and truly experience everything that it has to offer.

I miss it very much. I'm not a very emotional person, people close to me know this. But after India, just thinking about my time there and how much of an impact it made on me...makes me tear up. And the songs Ben has written over the past years that he's been in India, and I've heard these songs several times, they have a special meaning to me now...they have become personal. These songs bring India back to me. I didn't realize just how much I would miss it. It physically hurts that I'm not there anymore. 3 weeks was not enough time to be there.

I can't wait to go back.

India Bound

2007-02-23T14:00:00.000-08:00

This year I had the amazing opportunity to go to India. I had wanted to go about 2 years ago. Got scared and backed out. Kicking myself ever since then for being a wimp and not stepping out of the comfort zone. Well, I stepped out. Not so easily though. It took a lot of thought and urging from some close friends of mine.

Early on in 2005, I got this strange urge to email Ben (he was living in India for a few months then). At that point in time he was just an ex-boyfriend of mine, who I occasionally talked to when we hung out with our friends from church. But I just felt compelled to send him a little note from home, telling him that there are people thinking and praying for him. Little did I know where this one little email would lead us.

We emailed back and forth for the whole year that he lived there. He would tell me about everything he saw and experienced there. Share with me some stories of people he met. Then..here it comes...."You need to come to India".

At this point, my stomach is all in knots. A slight headache is creeping up. India? Mmmm. Not so sure. I had heard stories from my sister, my brother-in-law, and one of my ex-roommates..they had all been there before. They didn't have any bad stories at all, in fact they were all pleasant stories. It was just the thought of me traveling all the way across the world, into a country that I knew nothing about. The thought freaked me out a little bit. But the more I thought about the possibility of me going, the more I started to pray and ask God if this is something I could do.

Then Ben came back home to Oregon in February 2006. A couple months later...the view of my future changed quite a bit. Ben and I were pretty much inseparable from the time he got back in town. It was just a matter of time before we would become "official". I knew coming into this relationship that I would have to come to grips with India. This country is extremely important to Ben and I knew that if we wanted to head into the direction our relationship was going...I would have to make a decision about India. And the only way for me to really do that was to go. Village was sending a team January 2007. I had 9 months to think, pray, and prepare myself for all the reasons I was going on this trip.

Well, 9 months flew by but during that time I really got to know a lot about India and a lot about myself. The team went through months of training so I was really feeling prepared and amazingly, I had no nervousness about it. God gave me an incredible peace. I was SO ready to go. So excited to finally get to this country that I had heard so much about.

The whole experience leading up to the trip was enjoyable. Tiring. But nothing that I couldn't handle. I'm really looking forward to more traveling in the future.

Baby Blogger

2007-02-23T13:45:00.000-08:00

I'm new to the blogging world so you will have to be patient. I will try my best to blog somewhat frequently. We'll see how that goes. I've attempted blogger before...then gave up. But I'm back after much persistence from the boyfriend. :o) Hope you enjoy!