Currently Reading...

The Shack. I'm almost done, only a couple chapters left.

I know there is a lot of controversy surrounding this book. Church leaders slamming it for it's off-beat theology, others claiming it to be life-changing and a book that brought God into a new light.

However to interpret this book is up to the reader themselves. You may be one who knows about the controversies and puts up a great defensive barrier before even picking up the book. Or you may be one who approaches the book as purely fiction, a good read...and nothing more.

I chose to pick up the book with an open mind. I deliberately chose to not read any reviews or listen to any one's conversations regarding the book so that I wouldn't be influenced either way. And I'm so glad I did.

Even though I'm not completely finished with the book I have a pretty good grasp of the concept and direction the writer is going. But I kept reminding myself...this is fiction.

If you haven't read the book and you wish to, you might not want to read the rest of my post...I wouldn't want to spoil too much or even be one of those people whose insights enable other's thoughts on the matter.

Throughout reading the book, as I said before, I intentionally kept my mind open to all possibilities. Sure, the author might have some interesting takes on God, Jesus, The Spirit and many other things but I didn't want to discredit him and shut it all down before I actually gave it a little more time and thought. I'm not saying I agree with him totally..by any means. But there are some very valid points and some truth in his writing which were encouraging to me as I read them. Those feelings that he portrays the main character, Mack, having are feelings that I have felt before. Those questions that Mack so genuinely asks are questions I think most people have cried out wondering what the answers were.

It took me a bit of time to get passed Mack's first meeting at the shack. I'm sure many people were stumped by his encounter. At first I laughed. Of course the author feels he needs to be politically correct. Woman, black, Asian, middle eastern...and later on Hispanic, all rolled into one to create the Trinity and other attributes of God.

But then I thought. Why not? I kinda like the spin the author took on it. It took me awhile to get passed it but I thought, I'm glad he didn't limit the image of God. Putting the image of God into writing and into an actually picture is impossible anyway. So I'd like to think the author did the best he could, to make God a tangible image to a very hurt and lost man (Mack). I'm sure some people would totally argue with me on that because it is a little out there...but that's what happens when I keep an open mind. I don't like putting God in a box and limiting Him on how He can show Himself to others.

There's so much more to the book that I could write about and maybe after I finish it I'll post again. But for now I'll just end with:

This book is a good read. It is fiction. People can take from it what they wish. If they feel moved by what he says, great. If they are angered at what he says, that's fine too.

I've heard that many church pastors and other leaders have requested their congregations to read this book. For what reason, I don't know. It puts pressure on people to dig for some great meaning and inspirational enlightening and it elevates the expectations for a book. A book that wasn't even meant to be published in the first place, it was just to be for the writer's family and friends. He was encouraged to get it published by those close to him. It wasn't meant for the public to pick apart and criticise. So I don't think he had a preconceived agenda to change people's vision of God or their beliefs. He simply just took what was going on in his mind and heart and put it onto paper.

If I were given that opportunity I'm sure my vision of God and my jumbled thoughts on my life and my life with God and all the questions I have...well, some people may think I'm a little wacky and out there too.

Undo

Wouldn't it be great if life included an "Undo" button?

When you think everything is going great, then something happens. Something stupid is said and you make yourself seem like a complete fool. Or something hurtful comes spewing out of your mouth and it was never intended to translate the way it did. Or in a fit of anger you do incredibly irrational things, resulting in embarrassment.

These are times where I think an "Undo" button would be very helpful. Actually there are a few keys on the keyboard that would be useful. "Backspace", "Delete", even "Home"...basically any keyboard function that will take me immediately back to the beginning or to the specific place where things went wrong and need to be corrected.

If only it were that easy.

Dream..on the way to be...Coming True

When you are a kid, a common question you are asked is: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

I'd have different answers to this question throughout many years but the most consistent answer I had was, "To be a wildlife photographer in Africa." That was what I wanted. My dream was to work for National Geographic.

I went as far as taking photography classes in junior high and I got my first real camera. It was very exciting. But I realized photography was not easy and it was an expensive hobby. As I got into high school, my interests turned to choir and so photography got pushed back a bit so I could focus on my opportunities that came along with the singing groups I was involved in.

Now that I'm out of school and choir is no longer on my mind, I have taken up the idea of getting back into photography. I love my little digital camera I have now, but I want to graduate up to a digital SLR camera. There are so many things that I'd love to capture and with great quality that a little digital camera is just not capable of doing.

I've been doing lots of research the past couple of months on what to look for in a good SLR and one that will fit my photography style. Like I had mentioned before, photography is an expensive endeavor. The body of an SLR can be in the thousands of dollars, that's not including the price of any lens. Which, if you want to really excel in photography you will want to purchase multiple lenses for versatility.

But I think I finally found the right one for me. I'm super excited too because the one I picked won't break the bank. Woo hoo! And it comes with a lens so I won't have to make too many additional purchases in order to use my camera. I probably won't be getting it for another couple of months still, so I have some time for preparation and saving.

What's even better is that I'll have this great camera before our next trip to India. (Oh yes, Ben and I are planning to join the next India trip again.) So I'll have some time to master this new camera, with the help of my soon to be photography partner and SLR expert...Erin. :o)

So my dream of being a wildlife photographer may not be too far off!! Especially with the globe trekking that Ben and I plan to do, I'm hoping to only get better and better. Maybe not good enough for National Geographic but I'm still optimistic on that one.

Starbucks Snob

Yep..that's me, it's official.

There is a deli on the first floor of my office building. They serve coffee and have a whole array of flavors to mix into any kind of drink you want. It's cheaper too, but I don't get coffee there. Because it's not Starbucks.

There is a 7-11 by my office building. They have coffee there too that is also cheaper. But again, I don't go there. Because it's not Starbucks.

The Starbucks by my work is actually in a terrible location. It only has 7 parking spots and it shares what little space it has with a Chevron gas station and a Mexican restaurant, and located on a high traffic road where Scholls becomes Skyline right off of Hwy 26. An unbelievably small space, but it doesn't stop the throngs of people that flood into that tiny parking lot to get fueled for the day, and I'm not talking about gasoline fuel.

I am one of those people fighting for an empty parking space. You wouldn't believe how aggressive and hostile people can be when they haven't had their morning coffee. Unfortunately I can be just as bad as any of them. I frequent this Starbucks so much that the baristi already know my order when I walk through the door and have it ready before I even pay.

Today it hit me just how much I rely on Starbucks. One of my ex co-workers got a job in a different building on Sylvan Hill but we are still within walking distance of each other. She called my office this morning and said she was on her way to Starbucks before heading to work. I gave her my order and she would be down in front of my building in 10 minutes.

I ran downstairs and there she was. I exchanged the money for the cup of coffee. I just had to say to her, "Wow, you have become my coffee dealer. Nice doing business with you."

So there you have it. I have sunk so low that I refuse cheaper, more convenient, and more accessible coffee.

Just label me a Starbucks Snob...I'm satisfied with that.

Stress Relief

A lecturer when explaining stress management to an
audience, raised a glass of water and asked
'How heavy is this glass of water?'

Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.
The lecturer replied, 'The absolute weight doesn't
matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it.

If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem.

If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right
arm.

If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an
ambulance.


In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I
hold it, the heavier it becomes.'

He continued, 'And that's the way it is with stress
management. If we carry our burdens all the time,
sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy,
we won't be able to carry on.'

'As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for
a while and rest before holding it again.
When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.'

'So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of
work down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow.
Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for
a moment if you can.'

So, put down anything that may be a burden to
you right now.

Don't pick it up again until after you've rested awhile.

Mini Backpacks and Aviator Goggles?

That is what I dream about apparently.

I had a dream last night that I was in a pet shop. I came to a tank that had 2 hamsters in it. One had a little zip up jumpsuit and aviator goggles over it's beady little eyes. A hamster, with a mini jumpsuit! It even had a tiny little zipper.

The second hamster had a mini backpack on its back...as if it were about to head off to school.

I remember saying to myself in the dream that I would totally buy those hamsters just because of the outfits. They were so darn cute. I think I woke myself up by my laughing.

According to Ben this was a blog worthy dream. So I hope you enjoyed it. :o)

Tired of Being Sick

I don't understand why in the last 4-5 months I've gotten sick so much. It actually started earlier than that. September. It was my birthday and I was moving to a new apartment...in 90 degree weather. I had a terrible cold and was completely miserable. My head and ears throbbed to the point where I was lying on the floor in tears and to those who know me that was a big thing since I'm not prone to tears.

Then after the wedding and honeymoon I came to work in early January...and discovered I was breaking out in hives. No big deal, I figured they would go away in a few days, maybe a week at the most. A month went by and I had broken out at least once every day, in different areas and to different degrees of severity. It was miserable, especially since the doctors couldn't figure out what was causing them.

Then just this past week I noticed some little red bumps on my left hand. I thought, Oh great! Hives are back. I pulled up the sleeve of my shirt to see what extent they had traveled up my arm. They just stayed around the underside of my left wrist and the palm of my hands. Odd. The next day I saw a few red bumps on the palm of my right hand. But these felt different than hives and I knew they had to be something different. I took Benedryl and all sorts of medication that I had on hand from my hives experience, but nothing was helping.

I went to urgent care, they gave me a steroid cream but they still didn't know what was wrong. They offered me a business card to a dermatologist office, I called but unfortunately they couldn't see me until May. So I talked to my parent's and they gave me the number to their doctor. I scheduled an appointment with my parents' doctor that same day. When I saw him he said in his 20+ years of experience as a doctor, he has never seen my condition in his life. He even pulled another specialist from his office into the room to check out my hands. He didn't know what it was either. The doctor assured me that he would call a couple dermatologists that he knew first thing the following morning.

I got into the dermatologist around 2pm in the afternoon, expecting to be poked and scraped but he said since my condition had been going on for 4 days now, the best time to do any tests would have been on the first day of the break out. Funny he says that when it's darn near impossible to get an immediate appointment with a dermatologist. Anyway, he still got to examine me and he came up with some sort of an explanation for me. Even though it's not for sure, since he wasn't able to do tests to confirm but he had a good idea that it is a form of Herpes Simplex. I pretty much freaked out at that point, but he assured me that just like cold sores are a strain of "herpes"...that is kind of what I have on my arm and palms. He said it would go away in a couple weeks and to put steroid cream on and it will be fine. Well, I'm glad I finally have an answer to why I was in agony over my arm and palms itching and burning like crazy.

But it does not end there...

I woke up this morning with a sore throat, swollen glands, throbbing head, muffled ears, and achy body. Lovely. I thought I was done with all my sickness. Then I remembered that the dermatologist had said I have a weakened immune system now, which probably helped bring on my arm herpes stuff in the first place.

I just want to be well again!